Its ridiculous how much I listen to music. I'm constantly singing, lyrics always running through my mind, so much so that I'll be in a car other than my own, or out somewhere with friends, at the movies or whatever and I'll have moments where I'm wishing that I was listening to a particular song instead of doing whatever I'm doing. I guess you could call it obsessive but music just means so much to me. Plain and simple. I get such a thrill and so many emotions running through me when I listen to songs that I love. I relate to them so much. I've had Algernon Cadwallader songs playing in my head for the last three days, I don't want it to end.
Feels like the next step is to start playing music.
The move to Portland is nearing closer and closer. Guess you could say that I'm nervous or apprehensive, but excited all the more. I had a dream last night that I gained about 30 pounds and had a big hump on my back. These feelings that I have are extra baggage, weighing me down.
I had this really awful feeling on Tuesday. Feelings of pain on my neck and shoulders and one sharp pain around my left hip. After I had a tough conversation that I had been avoiding all these pains went away, I felt lighter. Its amazing what the body can do. Now I have to have the conversation with myself. Get myself out of bed in the morning and outside, even though I think sleeping in is "luxurious" because I don't have any other obligations in the morning and I should "take advantage" of the extra sleep.
In the dream I had there was also a lot of swimming in pools. Its been on my mind. Its summer and I really enjoy swimming. Art will be posted later, I've been meaning to put some up.
Got my foot behind my head today. Yay for small accomplishments! I credit the amazing massage I enjoyed earlier in the day. Still haven't figured out the technique to balancing compass pose, but in due time, in due time. I give it a week! haha.
Been spending a lot of time quietly contemplating my existence and sweating buckets. Its been good.
The trip to San Francisco is nearing, March 10th you will come too soon! I am super stoked. Can't wait to have four days with beautiful faces surrounding me and ever more gorgeous hearts. I may not come back!
I can safely say that I am now completely single, no attachments.
It feels good. It took about a week of silence on my part to realize just how I feel as a person, and I need to improve on finding happiness and contentment within myself and not someone else. Especially if I'm not completely satisfied with the person I'm seeing. I'll find that puzzle piece one day.